May. 31st, 2009

nerdherder: (you make panda sad :'()

MAKE MINE CANINE: Why Not To Panic If Your Intersect Turns Into a Dog
A five point presentation.

POINT #1
Stay in the car, Chuck.
Actually stays put when told to. Just remember to leave the car window open a crack so he can breathe.

POINT #2
So, in this plan, I do absolutely nothing?
Since the asset is no longer able to talk, it is now a lot more difficult for Fulcrum to work out where the Intersect is hidden, thus better ensuring its safety.

POINT #3
Did you flash?
What’s that, Chuck? Timmy’s a member of an international terrorist organization planning to blow up the capital?

POINT #4
Don’t freak out.
Existential angst and work stress boils down to ‘Bone now? Or bone later? Okay, okay, but there’s a bone in here somewhere, right?’

POINT #5
Oh, Chuck me.
Constant need to go outside and chase non-terrorist affiliated squirrels.
Dog whisperers.
Pooper scoopers.
Chuck slobber has a tendency to get on items of national importance..
Occasional need to go outside and chase terrorist-affiliated squirrels.
Rebuking him gives the same feeling of guilt as kicking a puppy.
Suddenly-inappropriate metaphors.
Constant need to go outside and bury Casey’s arsenal.
Tendency to eat whatever is placed in front of him, regardless of whether it is suspected to be poisoned.
Occasional need to go outside and dig up Casey’s arsenal.

He’s actually really cute.




Community: [livejournal.com profile] justprompts
Prompt: Oops
Word Count: 232
Author's note: "...I don't even know."

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Chuck Bartowski

June 2009

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